#remember bandito

[pilotstreets]

do you ever think about the different ways dema and trench call for you?

like, dema calls for you in a way trench never will. it’s the home you can’t stomach to stay in but never want to leave. dema loves you in a suffocating way that has no escape, but trench loves you in a loud and colorful way. when dema calls, it’s hauntingly beautiful and you hesitate to cover your ears, but trench calls for you in an inviting melody that everyone joins in on. dema claws its hands into you and forces you to stay, but trench wraps you in a hug and is happy to welcome you. dema is glad it can scare you into staying because it’s scared of you leaving, but trench is glad to be so loving you never think about leaving. leaving dema feels almost like betraying someone close to you, or losing part of yourself, but being in trench with banditos is being surrounded by extensions of yourself, life flowing through all of you. trench is peace, and dema is fear.

[sleepyjim]

you listen to a band for long enough and eventually they got u memorizing hex codes

[lesbiten]

im so excited for the concert but now i have to learn the words to songs i dont listen to :pensive:

[oldiesstationlover11607]

Hello,

I was wondering if maybe you could write some sort of fluffy story with torchbearer Josh. Maybe something angsty/fluffy, like reader being worried about him before the Banditos go to do the big fight at Dema in Paladin Strait? If not, that’s okay too. No pressure. I’m just happy I found someone writing TØP on this site.

We're Going Back - Torchbearer!Josh Dun x GN!Reader

Pairing: TorchbearerJosh x Gender Neutral Bandito Reader

Warnings: Some swearing, anxiety/panic attacks, fight between Josh and Reader (reader actually is mean guys) There's fluff at the end tho!!

Word Count: 1523 (a nice long one for you anon)

Summary: When Reader finds out that Clancy and Torchbearer are going back into Dema she does everything she can to prevent it.

A/N: I hope you enjoy this as much as I enjoyed writing it anon. Please feel free to request more because I honestly love writing for twenty one pilots. And requests are what help keep me writing I-/

Note - some of this is headcannon for the purposes of making the story work

The day Clancy and I left Dema, I knew there was no going back. It just wasn’t happening. We’d managed to escape together. He’d been outside the walls alone before but during the annual assemblage he’d convinced me to ‘tag along’ as he’d put it. We’d been close friends growing up in Dema, that was just the way it was. Things changed once we left. I remember the day I met the Torchbearer, Josh. It took a lot longer than I thought it would to learn his name. For reasons unknown; he'd kept it a secret known only by his closest friends (or in my case, girlfriend). Clancy and I had only spent a few weeks at the Bandito camp before he was recaptured. He was gone for years. While I knew Josh was looking out for him, I knew exactly what kind of pain Clancy was going through. It was Dema. Josh hadn’t grown up within the walls like Clancy and I, things were different for him, he didn’t know what he was getting himself into. Which was why when he reunited with Clancy and brought him back to the camp, my panic attacks started.

“Oh god you look so different,” I cried into Clancy’s shoulder, “are you okay? I mean, of course you’re not. You’re back.” He nodded quietly, I could feel the tightness of his body in my arms. “What’s wrong?” I asked. 

“We’re going back in,” he voiced bluntly, looking at Josh who nodded knowingly. This wasn’t happening. Clancy wasn’t going back, he’d just gotten out. He’d just been forced against his own will to create propaganda for the very institution that nearly killed us. Not to mention Josh hadn’t been physically in the city for longer than a few hours before. Of course they weren't going in there. Right? 

“You should go get some rest before we start preparations,” Josh said, clearly noticing the shocked look on my face. “It’s good to have you back, Clancy.” Clancy’s eyes darted to mine before he walked toward the tent that had been empty for years. Josh and I were left alone, standing in the middle of the camp. 

“You said we,” I muttered. 

“I did,” he replied, looking at me carefully. He’d grown used to the constant nightmares I’d had about my time in Dema and worries about Clancy. “You know why we're doing this,” He said. His tone made it clear he was  stating the obvious.

“You’re going with him,” I could feel my head throbbing as I grabbed his hand tightly. Josh looked at me, a quiet sigh escaping him while he led me to our private tent. 

“Of course I am.” He said matter of factly; like he never would have even considered another option. We sat down, his arms wrapping around my torso, the brightly coloured tattoo sleeve peeking out under his shirt. 

“It’s not safe and you goddamn know it Josh,” my voice trembled as I remembered my time in the city. All I could think about was how isolating and cold it was. Josh almost chuckled, despite the fact that the situation really wasn’t funny.

“I’m aware it’s dangerous,” He retorted, his hand resting on his forehead before he looked at me again,“I’m not gonna let him go in there alone.” 

“The bishops will kill you the second they see you, and then what? The rebellion is over. Both of our leaders will be dead, the banditos will be killed and everyone will have lost.” Josh was getting frustrated now, his grip on me loosening with every exchange. He didn’t want to be having this conversation, I could tell, but he knew if he tried to walk away I’d just follow him.

“That’s not going to happen. We have a plan, we’ll be fine,” He said, his voice full of empty hope. I knew what I was about to say when I said it, I knew I was firing a shot. One I’d been keeping in till I needed to use it. 

“Oh and how did your last ‘plan’ turn out Josh? What with Clancy being recaptured and forced to write SAI?” He dropped his arms from me and moved away so he was sitting directly in front of me. 

“Don’t.” He snapped, a hand raising and pointing at me. “Don’t bring that up.” He clenched his teeth, his jaw tightening as anger and frustration was starting to overtake his mind. I had to fight the urge to continue throwing emotional bullets his way. I was going to make it clear to him that it was dangerous in Dema, that he couldn’t go, regardless of whether or not it hurt our relationship. Because I loved him and I couldn’t lose any more than I already had. 

“Why not?” I challenged him, “It was your plan.”

“You think I don’t know that?!” he exhaled, his whole body tense now as he yelled. “You don’t think I lay awake at night thinking it’s all my fault Clancy was captured?” His fists were clenched, he was fighting the urge to punch something. Maybe himself, maybe a wall. He closed his eyes and took a couple deep breaths, trying to calm himself like he’d taught me when I’d had nightmares. He looked like he was about to check out for the rest of the day, what I’d said really had an impact on him. “Stop,” He managed to mutter, still fighting to stay in control of his emotions.

“Okay,” I nodded. I knew exactly how he’d felt about Clancy and SAI. I knew he thought it was his fault so he spent every waking hour with Clancy, making sure he could get back safely. I knew he blamed himself, not only for Clancy’s time back in Dema but also for hurting me. He hated himself so much already and hearing me remind him of what he thought about himself all the time was making him feel terrible. He swallowed hard, his eyes darting for a moment before he finally spoke again, his voice shaky. “Just stop… please..”

I reached out to hold him, “I’m sorry, I went too far Josh.” He rested his head into the crook of my neck, quiet sobs filling the air. He melted at my touch, his arms wrapping around me and pulling me closer as he held back sobs.

“Please,” He eventually muttered, “Please don’t hate me.”

“I could never hate you, I’m just scared. I don’t want you or Clancy leaving me again, I can't take any more losses,” I pressed my lips to his temple. 

“I know, I know,” He mumbled, his eyes squeezed shut as he was trying to compose himself. I continued to hold him tightly, not wanting to ever let go. “I’m scared too,” he added, his voice quiet. Eventually he pulled back and looked at me, his eyes slightly bloodshot from crying. He took a deep breath, still trying to keep hold of whatever composure he could. “We’ll be fine, I promise,” he mumbled, but even I could tell he had doubts. 

“You can’t promise that,” I sighed. 

“Watch me,” he replied sternly, though the shakiness in his voice didn’t help. He reached a hand out now, a cold palm cupping my chin as his eyes met mine. “I promise, we’ll come back. You have my word.” He leaned in, resting his forehead against mine for a few moments. 

“If I lose you, I need you to know that you're the best thing to ever happen to me, Torchbearer.” I tried desperately to come to terms with the fact that I was going to have to let him go.

“Don’t talk like that,” He whispered, “Not like you’re already saying good-bye to me.” I cupped his face gently, pressing my lips to his in an attempt to wade off tears. He melted into the kiss, gripping his hands at my sides as he held onto me. He deepened the kiss, his head tilting so the angle was better as he pulled me closer. I would’ve been happy to stay here if it meant him not having to leave. We pulled back as the fabric of the tent rustled, Clancy entering. We pulled back as the fabric of the tent rustled, Clancy entering. 

“It's time to start packing supplies and getting the others ready if we want to make it on time.” With a slight exhale Josh pulled away, turning to look at Clancy and nodded.

“Yeah, yeah we need to get moving,” he mumbled, his hands letting me go.

“Josh?” I called, catching him just before he followed Clancy outside.

He turned to look at me again, a hint of concerned look plastered onto his face. 

“Yeah?” He replied, his voice quiet.

“You better keep that promise.” I desperately attempted to hold back my sobs, knowing full well that as soon as one slipped I was a goner. 

“I will,” he whispered, taking a step closer to me again. “I’ll come back.” With careful hands he reached out and wiped away a stray tear that was rolling down my cheek. “I’ll always come back to you.”

//

Please submit any requests y'all have! I love to write so let me know if you've got any!

[blurryfce300]

ok torchbearer time

so like we need to talk more about torchbearer’s ability cause i feel everyøne just went “forest fic canon haha” and brushed it off like

when tyler called it an ability i feel that wordage constitutes it being in the same category as clancy’s ability, yknow the one where he can be seized whilst alive. thats a big thing, and torchbearer alsø having an ability, the ability tø guide, is a big thing tøø.

but what exactly is that “ability to guide”, as tyler put it? i know people were saying its like a mental thing like he can make people think hes really there, but i think it goes further than that. i do think its an actual physical thing, he can physically project himself to people because remember, the letter from ned specifically addresses BOTH clancy and torchbearer being there. not just clancy. ned saw them both, keons knew they were bøth gøing tø be there. a hallucination wouldnt do that.

there’s the my blood parallels, too, and my blood stems playing at the end, but we have to keep in mind clancy is the protagonist, hes telling the story and this is all from his perspective. so him vanishing isnt him never being there, its more just a way of showing that clancy now realizes it wasnt the real torchbearer along with him since levitate. torchbearer is real, økay. josh is real.

now i have other questions that i, @gonerbird , and @tylerssblurry talked about.

firstly, does torchbearer and/ør clancy know? i think torchbearer definitely knøws, its his ability after all, but i clancy didnt until nøw in navigating. maybe he was told previously, but dema makes you førget things, so maybe he forgot about it.

secondly, do the other banditos knøw? im not sure about this, maybe they do, maybe they don’t. we don’t knøw if this is an ability torchbearer uses før every bandito tø guide them tø the øthers in trench, ør sømething he uses sparingly for clancy and øther peøple he ør the øther banditos deems important to their cause. theres a lot we døn’t knøw and i døn’t think we’ll get a straight answer about it, like most things in this story.

and if he didnt tell clancy, well we can kinda understand why clancy is mad at torchbearer, like you imagine thinking your best friend has been by yøur side før years through all this awful shit, being held captive and forced tø write and perform against yøur will and then having a near death encounter, then discovering you’ve been under attack from an external force this whole time, and før all that før him tø nøt have been there. it was him, but it alsø wasn’t. yøu’d be kinda mad, right? maybe mad enough to start your own rebellion, a more violent one that we might see.

alright thats all i have to say about that for now byeeeee

[mysadblacksoul]

Twenty One Pilots 7 - tape theory lol

So I think we all know what happened the other days. The red tape appeared on the covers of the past albums. What is interesting is that the tape only covers the eyes. Yet in case of Blurryface it covers one circle - and since it's Twenty One Pilots we talk about it has a huge significance

So get yourself a cup of coffee and let's break down the mystery 1. The tape - significance The tape was very important element to the previous eras. In Trench it was something that was used to cover what is important, which is yourself. Remember what happened in the Nico and the niners mv? After meeting Josh Tyler was given yellow tape to keep him safe.

But it was yellow - why? Because Bishops can't see yellow. So the tape this coloured can keep you safe. How we know that? Let's look back on Ride, Tyler says he likes to "stay in the sun where he's fine". The sun is commonly drawn as yellow.

In Scaled and Icy era the tape also made an appearance. In Saturday mv, after the submarine was flooded Josh used tape to try to fix it. But it was still the same yellow tape

Now the tape become red. It is usually associated with sacrifice, danger, and courage. But as you can see it is not used by the pilots. This tape is used by the Bishops to cover people/animals eyes. To prevent them from seeing something they are not supposed to.

But is it the first time we see the red tape? Not really, it is the colour that Josh used in Guns for hands mv. And as you can see the tape also covers his eyes...

2. Tape - covering eves

How we know it's Bishops? Well, they are the one who banned music from Dema. It is possible that they don't want other's to see what Banditos were doing, the rebellion. What does the tape cover?

On Vessel, it’s on the eyes of Tyler and Josh’s grandfathers, who in the album art could’ve served as the same vessel for their spirit.

On Blurryface, it’s blocking out the first circle, made for HDS. The bishop associated with that? Keons, the one turned (told you it will be important later).

On Trench it's over the eyes of a vulture, the Bandito’s symbol.

And on SAI it covers the eyes of Trash. Why? Trash the dragon represents a vulture. Citizens of Dema literally call vultures “trash dragons”, it means that they’re covering the vulture’s eyes completely.

3. Covering eyes in lyrics

The lyric from The Outside of course - "I’ve got a long drive, I’ll tape my eyes, so I don’t fall asleep again"

But we can also see eye reference in Heavydirtysoul in "Gangsters don't cry / Therefore, therefore I'm /Mr. Misty-eyed, therefore I'm". And you might ask yourself what the hell does HDS have to do with anything. Well it has a lot to do with Keons. 4. Keons and his importance

So we already established that he is important to this theory, because he is the one who is covered on the Blurryface cover. His name is derived from a Heavydirtysoul lyric, “choKE ON Smoke”. Th

So he is a Bishop but his eyes are covered - why? Well he could be on Bandito side this whole time. Crazy, I know but hear me out.

In the music video storyline, Keons plays a pivotal role in aiding Tyler's escape from Dema and supporting the Banditos in their fight against the oppressive bishops. Keons orchestrates a diversion to allow Tyler to flee and leads a plan to crash the submarine, saving Tyler from the fake bishops' schemes. He also frames another bishop for the submarine incident, leading to their demise. Keons ultimately helps Tyler take control of a bishop vessel to destroy Dema from "the outside". Makes sense right? So it would make him a threat to the other Bishops - therefore he has to be eliminated or blinded. So that he won't interfere with their plan again.

5. Let's talk colours again I know I said that the tape is red. But is it actualy? It could be seen as deep orange and orange also plays a significance in the lore. It symbolizes being a prisoner, like in Heathens mv and Choker mv.

You might say that Heathens is not part of the lore at all. But if we talk colours then Tyler was literary wearing orange while bein opressed and then changed to yellow when he played with Josh. As if he gained the freedom to play music and where the music is prohibited? In Dema

And in Choker Tyler wore orange beanie, as a symbol of still being controled

So I believe that IF the tape is orange it could be a colour of opression. Which would makes sense for Bishops to use it. But overall it also stands for determination and strength. It is sure something that Banditos will need for the final battle lol

And in the rap part in Choker you have "You get taller, bolder, stronger and the rearview only blinds you".

The rearview has a symbolism itself. Meaning, if we knew in the past what we know now, we could have acted on that insight.

And fun thing. The drumset in Saturday was also orange

6. Let's circle back to what we know so far

Well, that the album is comming, which is exciting. That it would be full of lore and that we would see more of the Bishops who are out for blood and revenge

So... I will keep you updated when something new drops!

[f0linasahl0]

so i have been looking through old clancy letters because i am writing that story thing for the twenty one pilots lore to get the worldbuilding. i was looking at things and there's a line in the letter from "022 03MOON 18" where clancy says "though its been years since he last spoke with them, i hope they have not lost faith in the torchbearers plan." and remembering the navigating mv and how the torchbearer that was with clancy during the outside (which was around when this letter was posted onto the website) was clancy really fully seeing a hallucination of torchbearer? if i understand correctly from that, it would've been. he has not seen torchbearer or any of the other banditos for years and it was only him. i dont know if this was coherent train of thought, but i was just thinking that if he wasn't real, this is an interesting part of the letter. really shows that it was a hallucination.

(also i have started writing that story i was talking about in a previous post about the twenty one pilots lore and i am even more excited about it after i started writing it.)

[snekthedemonnoodle]

am i tripping or was there a theory that clancy was gonna sacrifice himself for the banditos? maybe i am but i still like that theory. yall remember a car a torch a death? yall remember ‘and then i said ill take the grave please just send them all my way’? its a good theory. sad, id be absolutely crushed if it was true, but still good. yall remember hometown? yall remember ‘youll make the fire my bones will make it grow’? remember paladin strait? remember how he gets smeared? maybe i am delusional BUT MAYBE I AM ON TO SOMETHING. well never know🙂

[confused-alienated]

Voiceless

Summary: "Josh would fight"

Tw: abuse, Dema

Notes: Set during the SAI era but Josh is real. I wrote this a while ago as a part of my prompts series. This is the first fix I've posted on here to don't mind any mistakes.

Word count: 756

Link to the og fic here

---

Being in Dema revealed a whole new side to Josh. Back in Trench, Josh was a stoic leader and he wasn't a man of many words either.

Dema seemed to have lit a fire in Josh. Whilst Tyler grew quieter and more withdrawn with each passing day, Josh only got louder. On their first day as prisoners, Tyler swore he'd heard Josh talk more than he had in their whole time knowing each other.

Back in Trench, Josh was quiet and sugar sweet, Tyler would have never thought that Josh was one to hate. Oh, how he was wrong. Every insult, every word, every syllable that Josh spat at one of the Bishops or their goons was laced with more venom than Tyler had ever heard.

Josh would fight.

Obviously the lack of filter led to, usually physical, punishments. Those deterred Tyler from following Josh and fighting aswell.

At the start, Tyler had begged Josh over and over again to, "Please stop fighting them!"

"I can't, Tyler," Josh had said plainly.

Tyler was so sick of arguing, that all he could do was sob into Josh's chest.

Tyler had stopped asking Josh to stop months ago.

The two never lost hope that the Banditos would come for them. They just didn't know when. They'd been there for six months.

The Bishops had decided that since both Tyler and Josh were 'very influential both inside and outside of Dema' that they should produce propaganda together.

They had been forced to form a band. It was a long term dream of the two. They both didn't want it to be like this.

Some days they would chain Tyler to his desk, he would only be allowed out once he'd written enough.

This only made Josh fight more aggressively and more often.

Tyler loved Josh but hated that he would fight. He hated how often Josh was getting punished.

As well as getting beaten, Josh would be starved and isolated. Tyler had lost count of how many times Josh had been smeared. Tyler hated it when Josh was isolated, it got lonely for him aswell.

Despite the cuts and bruises, Josh would always be there at the end of the day with some story or memory to lighten the mood.

---

Tyler remembered the day too well.

Josh had been dragged off for another punishment that morning. It had been hours, Tyler hoped he wasn't being isolated again.

The Bishops had given Tyler a day off, they'd told him it was for all his 'Good behaviour', whatever that meant.

Tyler had been laying on Josh's 'bed' since he'd been gone. He was half asleep when the door suddenly heavily swung open.

Nico entered the room and threw Josh on the floor.

Tyler waited for Josh's snide remark. It never came.

Nico mimiced a smile, "Hope you enjoyed your little break today. Back to work tomorrow, rabbit," he sneered then left, slamming the door shut. Tyler heard the lock and deadbolts click into place. They were in for the night.

Josh slowly got up and silently sat down next to Tyler.

Tyler waited for his usual 'How was your day?'. It never came.

Instead Josh took a shuddering breath and tears began streaming down his face. Tyler placed a careful hand around Josh's shoulders, trying to avoid any bruises.

"What happned?" Tyler whispered. Josh had never been this upset after a punishment.

Josh continued to cry. Tyler noticed that he wasn't making much sound. Josh was a loud crier. Tyler's stomach dropped. Even when he did cry he would always explain. Even if his cries were quiet, he would talk to Tyler.

Tyler slightly tightened his grip, "Joshie? Are you okay?"

Josh looked at Tyler helplessly.

"Can't talk?" Tyler got like that sometimes, distress and anxiety stealing his voice.

Josh slowly nodded before getting up and waking to Tyler's desk. Tyler watched curiously and stood to join him.

Josh's hands shook as he flipped through the notebook to a new page. He began writing something that Tyler couldn't quite see.

Josh's handwriting was nice. Maybe a little scratchy, a bit wobbly but nice.

Tyler heart lept to his throat when he read it.

'They took my voice.'

"What do you mean?" Tyler voice shook.

Josh pointed to the paper again.

'They took my voice.'

"Oh," Tyler breathed then brought Josh into his chest.

Josh cried harder. Tyler's jumper grew wetter and wetter with tears.

Tyler felt completely helpless. They had taken his voice.

Josh would fight. Well he used to anyway.

[kickedin17]

I saw your post about potential clancybearer fics, and oh boy, I have so many thoughts about Torchbearer in particular that got me writing way too much fic. Because yes the inherent tragedy of Clancy's character is already so fascinating but there's just something about being the person responsible for leading a martyr to their fate that has me Obsessed with Torch as a concept.

And the way that some videos imply some kind of relationship between them on top of that?? Is he more than allegory? Does he want to do this? I have so many questions, all of them probably have sad answers. I love those two, and would be very happy to see potential fics 👍

Ouhhhhhh yeah Torch is so complicated and I wish we got more from his perspective within the actual lore (maybe if we do actually get another album next year to finish up the story it'll include him more?? Hopefully??) but the nice thing about not knowing much about him is there's so much free space to speculate lol

Like I'm so curious what his situation is irt Dema, was he originally a citizen who successfully escaped (which means escaping the cycle is possible)? Or has he always been on the outside and if so what is wider bandito culture like, beyond their efforts to save Dema citizens and eventually defeat the Bishops? I'm still not fully clear on whether Clancy and Torch knew each other prior to the point where we start the story w/ the Trench cycle. It certainly seems like they did, at the very least Clancy seems to have known the banditos existed and coordinated an escape with them, but when/where did he meet Torch & at what point did Torch become this guiding force for Clancy? And like you said his role is basically to aid Clancy in martyrdom. Is that something they agreed upon or is it something Torch is just doing because he either believes it needs to be done or knows he can't persuade Clancy otherwise (or some other reason)?

I don't remember if it's a theory or actually confirmed but I like the idea that the fake Torchbearers Clancy sees during the SAI era up to the Navigating MV are actually projections of some kind intentionally sent by Torch to remind Clancy to keep fighting/to find his way back to the banditos, which is also how Torch knew where to find Clancy on voldsoy. Which obviously raises the question of how Torch is able to do something like that. Some altered form of psychokinesis maybe?

The more I think about it the more I think Torch's presence and guidance in Clancy's life is essential to him becoming the "prodigal son" of sorts who can be controlled by the Bishops while he's still alive, harness their psychokinesis without being one of them (probably), and ultimately be the one who can face them. Something something "I can't be alone" or whatever. I think Clancy was always fated to "wake up" to the realities of Dema in such a way that would prime him to destroy it, but I don't think he could do it without Torch.

I also really don't think Torch is fake or has been dead the whole time or whatever. If anything I would think he's just aware he's in a story and knows what role he has to play in it, even if it's hard or ends in tragedy. Because as far as we know, since we don't have his perspective yet, everything he's done so far the whole narrative has been orchestrated and intentional. We don't know how much he knows about the Bishops and everything prior to Clancy finding it all out, but at the very least he always knows where and how to find Clancy (maybe he just has an insane catboy radar lmao). Which is so interesting and sad!!!!! Love a guy who's haunted by the narrative. Fingers crossed he isn't also doomed by it. I really don't think he is but you never know

Idk if any of this rambling made sense lmao I'm just ponderin. Thank u for fueling me

[xproskeith]

This is an excerpt from something I wrote that I thought people may appreciate on its own:

Clancy was determined. He was going to find Nico and defeat him and the rest of the bishops. He was going to break the cycle. He had no problem using the power he'd been granted to swiftly handle the 7 other bishops. He was ready for Nico.

Or so he thought. When Nico burst through that door, Clancy froze. And then Nico's cold hands were around his neck. It happened so fast. Did Nico really move that fast? Or did it only seem that way because he froze when he finally saw Nico? Clancy couldn't be sure and in the end the answer didn't change anything anyway. Clancy closed his eyes, trying to gather himself and what he would do next. What he COULD do next. Then Nico began to speak, his monotone voice distorted and as cold as ice.

"So few..."

Memories of the banditos getting ready at the basecamp flooded Clancy's mind. Before the attack. There were so few compared to what they would be facing. Yet, they were all so resolved. They believed. In the cause, in the Torchbearer, and in Clancy. But there were still so few...

"So proud..."

Clancy's mind drifted to the Torchbearer. His first time seeing him after his escape. When he rescued Clancy from DEMA. All the times he fervently told him about the Banditos and the cause. How he stood there looking at him so proudly when they reunited at the fire back in Trench after his long journey. He was so proud. Of the cause, of the Banditos, and, for some reason Clancy still didn't understand, the Torchbearer was proud of him as well. He believed in him. But this is where Clancy found himself now... Clancy felt the antlers slip from his hands.

"So... Emotional..."

To Clancy's own surprise, he thought of himself in this moment. He thought back to the surges of emotion that spurred him to first try and escape DEMA and of the journal entries and letters he wrote. He remembered being enflamed by the Torchbearer's words and his cause. More so than even the other Banditos. His desire to defeat the bishops and Nico. Yet all he could feel in this moment was fear and despair.

"Hello, Clancy."

It felt like Nico's hands tightened around Clancy's neck. What was he going to do? He'd already released the antlers. He couldn't use the power he'd been granted. Nico had him. Clancy thought he'd been ready, but he wasn't. He froze. And now his chance was gone. It was over.

His eyes still closed, and lost in a sea of his own fear and anxiety, Clancy's mind found respite when it drifted to the memory of him and the Torchbearer's reunion.

---

"You're finally ready," said the Torchbearer, handing him the mask. "I knew you'd push on through and make it back safely."

Clancy looked at The Torchbearer, somewhat confused as reality kicked in.

"You were never there?" asked Clancy, not fully comprehending what was going on.

The Torchbearer smiled warmly and reassuringly at Clancy and said, "I told you I'd always be by your side going forward. Even if I can't be there physically, I'll still be there. I'll always help guide you like I did this whole time."

"But you couldn't physically get to me until now?"

"Unfortunately, no. After the bishops recaptured you again with their plans to use you, they made it impossible to get to you physically. But I was still able to project myself to you and with a little help from Keons, I was able to help guide you out."

"I see. Well, thank you. But how are you so sure I'm ready to face them now? I just barely escaped and made it back here."

A grin spread across The Torchbearer's face. "You may not fully realize it, but you're ready. You've changed and I've borne witness to it. You were able to harness the same power as the bishops, sure, but the most important part has been that change in YOU."

"I guess I'll have to take your word for it," said Clancy, laughing nervously.

"Trust me," said The Torchbearer. "When the time comes, you'll be ready and you'll know what to do."

---

That's right. Clancy couldn't give up. Not yet. He had to find a way out of this. Another way to stand and fight. Clancy had no idea how he was going to do it, but his resolve had never been stronger. Nico thought those words would discourage him, but instead they empowered him by reminding him of everything he was fighting for.

[starwitness42]

So first I had a horrible idea about the Torchbearer dying and Clancy having to seize his body. Then @sleepeys had to go and make amazing art about it. And now I wrote fic of it. Because my brain is rotted like an old moldy deck. So here's some fic if you want it! Be warned. Torchbearer is very much dead. Sorry Josh! The voices made me do it.

Clancy wakes up with lead in his stomach and a pounding in his head. He doesn’t remember much about last night, just the fire, the alcohol, and the Torchbearer’s arms cradling him safely as they slept. But hangovers have never felt like this before.

Something’s wrong.

He stumbles out of his tent, making it only a few steps before he’s throwing up in the dirt. But there’s no one around to see his embarrassment. There’s no one around at all. And the panic he’d felt upon waking kicks up another few notches.

He checks every tent, his unease doubling every time he finds another one empty. And he’s so focused on that, and on the campfire, slowly burnt down to embers with no one to tend it, that he doesn’t even realize it’s sundown and not sunrise until the sky begins to darken overhead.

How long was he asleep?

He searches his mind for his last memory. The Torchbearer had kissed him softly before burying his face in Clancy’s neck. His voice whisper quiet as he’d said, “I love you. You know that, right?”

Clancy knew that, Clancy knows that, but what Clancy doesn’t know is where the hell everyone has gone. And then it hits him.

Two weeks ago, Clancy had finally made it home. Two weeks ago, Clancy had been reunited with the Torchbearer, the real one, not the figment tasked with guiding him back. And two weeks ago, the Torchbearer had kissed him, not softly that time, and told him that if he ever lost him again, he’d die.

No, he thinks, and “No!” he shouts, though no one is around to hear him. They couldn’t have left, could they have? The plan was to attack Dema in one week’s time, for the banditos to create a disturbance in the city while Clancy went after Nico. Take down the king and the rest will fall. But that was supposed to be in a week.

Clancy runs, his feet carrying him wildly in the direction of the city, his heart pounding in time to the fears circling his thoughts like vultures. They can’t be dead; he can’t be dead. He tries to force these thoughts into the swirling mess inside his head but every time he does, the fear comes back at him with a vengeance, threatening to cripple him as he runs.

It’s the middle of the night when he finally makes it. The city is on fire, the world around him burning as he steps over the bodies of his fallen friends, green and yellow splashed with blood. And Clancy might be sick again if he had anything but fear and rage inside his stomach right now.

He looks down at the antlers, picked up without him even really realizing it, still clutched in his fists like a lifeline. And then he looks up at the tower, tears in his eyes, running down his cheeks, as he raises his hands, closes his eyes, and reaches out.

He can hear himself sobbing when the seize takes hold, can hear his own grief like an echo as he opens his eyes and looks up from the floor of a darkened room. He’s in the tower. He is in the tower, the Torchbearer is, his body not even cold yet despite being drained of the life that had lit him up like a thousand suns. And as that knowledge washes over Clancy, all he’s left with in its wake is incomprehensible rage.

He's screaming, his voice ragged with it, the emotion primal as he gets to his borrowed feet and meets the eyes of the bishop he was supposed to kill.

“Hello, Clancy,” Nico says, and though Clancy cannot see his face, he can hear the smile in his voice.

It will be the last one Nico ever wears.

They fight, the dagger the Torchbearer had died clutching against the one the bishop always carries with him, but in the end, it doesn’t matter. Nico can’t kill what’s already dead, and Clancy will not stop until Nico’s lungs are as empty as the Torchbearer’s, his rage carrying him on through the fight until Nico is nothing but a lifeless heap on the stone floor.

He falls to his knees, dropping the blade so he can wrap his arms around himself, around the Torchbearer, one last time. His face buried in his shoulder, in the fabric of the Torchbearer’s hoodie, as he chases the scent of him before it’s gone forever.

“I love you, too,” he says with the Torchbearer’s voice. “You know that, right?” But the Torchbearer does not respond. And so in the end, all that Clancy is left with is the silence of the dead.

[rose-grimm-spirit-does-dumb-shit]

Dear beloved and somewhat feral clique of Tumblr. Were you unable to obtain digital remains for whatever reason? {Broke, found out too late, lost track of time and forgor, only just came into the fandom now, etc.} Are you ripping and tearing at your insides for the carnal desire to know what the hell's in that exclusive booklet, maybe even turn it into a physical booklet for your own self indulgence? Do you really just want to have Clancy and the 4 "A Night With" renditions of the Clancy singles all for yourself on your silly little device with a cool unique allbum cover?

Well I totally Don't have the thing for you!

As this is totally not a file garden link to all the songs. I promise it's not.

Nor is this a google docs link to the entire booklet pdf. Why would I be distributing that.

Do with this what you will tumblr clique, I don't care. I just like sharing and helping with archival and accesibilty down the line.

But remember! Loose lips sink ships, and I don't want Warner Artists on my arse for helping my fellow bandito bastards out!

[moons-epiphany]

clancy album review

i have finally listened to clancy and watched all the music videos so i thought it'd give a little album review

okay first i'll give each song a star rating out of 5 which will mean:

1 star = i didn't like it

2 stars = it was okay

3 stars = i liked it

4 stars = i really liked it

5 stars = i loved it

(also disclaimer in case anyone tries to come for me lmao - i've been a clikkie since 2016 back when i was a young cringefail teen so just bc i'm not a massive fan of all of their songs does not mean that i hate the band or that i'm not a true fan or anything. fans can be critical of the bands/media they like and in fact i encourage it. okay anyway, let's go.)

album rankings

and, because why not, here's my ranking of all of the top albums so far:

trench (5 stars): you can take this album from my cold dead hands. i firmly believe that this was top's best album music wise. (also the bandito tour was an overwordly experience that i'm grateful i saw twice so i'm very biased towards this album).

vessel (5 stars): my favourite album (despite being second). it's very nostalgic for me. when i think of twenty one pilots i usually think of guns for hands first as both the song and music video are peak.

blurryface (5 stars): i love every song from this album :) also tear in my heart was the first ever twenty one pilots song that i listened to <3

self-titled (5 stars): every song is a banger. ate no crumbs.

regional at best (5 stars): again every song is a banger.

clancy (4 stars): some songs will have to grow on me but i largely like most of it.

scaled and icy (4 stars): i did really like this album and i did like the sound but only after listening to it a few times (and the live stream experience really helped me to like it even more because that slapped).

track rankings

alrighty now for the actual songs themselves. also another disclaimer, i'm not a musician, i don't know a lot of the terms lmao i'm just a sensory seeking autistic and listen to music a lot. also i listened to all the songs first and then watched the music videos (not including the singles - overcompensate, next semester and backslide - though) if that adds anything at all.

1. overcompensate (4.9 stars): okay the reason why i put my album ranking is because you need to know how much i love trench lmao. the bandito sample at the start was the peak of the album for me. the rest of the song is why it's a 4.9 (i'm being kinda petty with this lmao) and not a 5 star song but i have listened to it a bunch of times and it is a banger. also the muscial video created the perfect level of hype for the album, it made me very excited for the rest. a strong opener indeed!

2. midwest indigo (5 stars): now i know it might be silly to have a 5 star song below a 4.9 star song but listen this is my ranking list and i can do what i want ;3*. when this song first played it reminded me of what i call my "don't stop believeing" song. essentially, songs like these make me react like how every white person, like myself, reacts to don't stop believing when it comes on. that song for me is magnolia by gang of youths. as soon as the first note is heard, i am up. midwest indigo is a close second to magnolia. this is the highest praise i can ever give to a song lmao. also the music video is very twenty one pilots to me seen by tyler tweaking on the ice and dancing - remember when i said that guns for hands is the first thing i think of when i think of twenty one pilots and have you seen how weird he dances in that music video? /pos (dw this is a compliment) [*it's second and not first because overcompensate is a certified twenty one pilots song, if you don't know what that means, i can't help you just trust me on this.]

3. at the risk of feeling dumb (5 stars): okay so this song just makes me want to cry because 1) it hits close to home and 2) i'm going through some shit right now and this song just perfectly describes it. i also love the music video, it may be simple** but i really like it. the way that at the end it gives like classic band vibes? like i can think of a lot bands that have had that same shot of very close up to the camera stood on top of a building lmao. [**in comparison to some of their higher production music videos with the special effects and what not]

4. vignette (5 stars): as soon as this song started i liked it. it gave me gang of youths vibes (one of my fav bands, listen to magnolia linked above!!) tyler's vocals in the chorus come throughhh (this means that i loved them). such a groovy and cool song, how can you not like it is the real question. i also love the shouted (or at least in top terms just a slight volume rise lmao) "where do i go from here?". and don't get me started on that little music break oooooh so stimmy. the "(denial)" part after "no-no, not me, it's for a friend" is also hilarious in a way i can't describe. the music video: what was that red piece of paper??? that's a lovely portrait of josh, but tyler, what is that paper????

5. navigating (5 stars): loved this song as soon as it started, i loved the groovy retro almost 80s vibes to it?? and in typical top fashion i thought "oh this song sounds groovy the lyrics must be really sad" and then bro started saying "disassociate" in the chorus lmao. but anyway yes, i instantly adored this song. the song is just so stimmy, i was stimming pretty much the whole time this song was playing. obsessed with the music playing in the background of the verses. also obsessed with the way tyler sings "navigating" idk he just says it in a way that's fun. further, obsessed with the bridge and the bass. so the music video. first of all, why did the aspect ratio change, was that just me? secondly i'm welsh so i loved the daffodil cameo <3 thirdly, WHAT??? WHY IS MY BLOOD HERE? WHAT'S WITH THE MY BLOOD SAMPLE? WHAT DO YOU MEAN BY THE MY BLOOD SAMPLE??? WHAT DOES THIS MEAN???? HUH???

6. the craving (both versions): listen i'm not rating this, it's a cute wholesome sweet love song for his wife. it would be evil to say anything bad about this and it doesn't really feel like my place to say anything about it in the first place, yk? the song isn't for me. however, the music video... what? there was me thinking they were making a cute music box for their family or something only for it be a box for a bullet??? huh???

7. backslide (4 stars): we now enter the songs that i didn't instantly love, but i'm sure they'll grow on me. i really like backslide but what's stopping me from giving it 5 stars is the chorus, which is complicated. i love the sound paired with the vocals but i just feel weird about it??? idk how to explain it. the music video also doesn't help bc i don't really like the part where he rides his bike through the wind and rain. i get it. i get why. but i just don't really vibe with it??? i'm being really petty about this but i just can't get over it. apart from all that i really liked it. i loved the references in the music video but justice for that meat patty damn.

8. next semester (4 stars): okay not an instant hit for me. it sounded very pop punnky 5sos-y??? which isn't a bad thing but it's not my usual taste. however, i loved the chorus. the vocals and the sound are peak, i love it. also the ukulele part, love love love. also the "oh-whoa-oh" part is amazing too, i'm a massive fan of "oh-whoa-ohs" and i also love it when vocals overlap. i alsoooo love it when there's a group of people singing together :) it's also so catchy? i find myself humming and singing it a lot. the music video was very sweet, having members of the clique there singing along was a lovely detail. the bow at the end too :')

9. lavish (4 stars): this song took me by surprise. it still sounds like the classic top sound but in a way i never expected they'd go, yk? and i think it worked! honestly, there's no reason why this is a 4 star rather than a 5 star, i just feel like the 5 stars are in a different catergory if that makes sense? i loved those better. also the music video for lavish is my favourite out of all of them. it's so fun. the suits and sunglasses. the weird ass dancing from tyler and josh just being there. it's groofy, it's got charm. i love it so much.

10. routines in the night (3 stars): okay i know a three doesn't look great but this song isn't my usual taste in music, nothing necessarily bad on the song or anything. i loved the vocals on this track and i find it catchy because i will sing along to it. i also found it was too cool for top if that makes sense?? like it's very different from the ukulele emo band yk? again, not a bad thing, just not *my* thing though i can see this growing on me for sure. also i see those references in the music video.

11. paladin strait (3 stars): this song is confusing. i like it but there are parts where i don't like it so i averaged it to a 3. i feel like those vocals don't really match the song? i'm not sure. i know i just talked about the good old emo ukulele days but i feel like the ukulele doesn't really fit here?? i did like the "here's my chance" bit, though i still felt like something was wrong about it?? idk. i also really liked the lyrics, they were very sweet and encouraging :) i've listened to this song a bunch of times and still the random ukulele that starts playing jumpscares me T^T it happens so suddenly lmaooo but that part is nice :) then the rest... the fpe???? hello clancy??????? hello???? clancy is still in the thick of it, huh? finally showdown vibes, i'm ready let's go. i've also seen theories about how this relates to the isle of flightless birds which is very interesting and i mean they did play it recently sooooo.

12. oldies station (3 stars): okay when this first started playing it gave me children's song vibes, you know? like it was a kids song or even a song in the background of youtube videos or something. that is to say, i didn't really like it. however, the lyrics were sweet and i liked the line "your favourite song was on the oldies station" :') yeah that hits oof. i also liked the "you don't quite mind" part! it saved the song for me i won't lie. it was very sweet and nice :) nothing really bad to say about it. also the lyric "you're in the crowd at her first dance recital" was very sweet :') as for the music video: yo homies you just killed someone. anyone gonna comment on that at all? and the white pole things moving was really trippy T^T i hated it, it hurt my eyes.

13. snap back (2.5 stars): honestly when this first started playing it gave me like txt / kpop vibes??? not a bad thing as such but just surprised me. however... i gave it a 2 so i wasn't really a fan of this song. though i did like the "i've been praying for my elasticity..." part. that was really vibey :) if we wanna get personal real quick then i'm someone who becomes quite angry and quick to irritation when i'm not doing well mentally and can lash out at people as a result so normally i relate a lot to lyrics like the ones in this but something just felt off about them??? it kinda felt like 'oh i hurt people when i was mentally unwell the other day but why haven't they forgiven me?' type of vibes??? (i got this largely from the lyric "blacklisted from forgiveness") essentially it sounds like an excuse for doing something shitty to someone when you're mentally unwell which doesn't sit right with me.* which i know is referenced in the song itself -> "i have seemed to run out of excuses of why i am this way" which yeah i relate to that because i have said those exact words to myself before, so i get it. i have first hand experience. it's something that i have done before but deeply regretted and don't really want to be reminded by a song. in short, "i am in this and i don't like it." the music video itself was fine i guess but didn't really change my opinion of the song at all. [*also remember that music is up to interpretation, so just bc this is how i see it does not mean that this is the actual meaning, reasoning or the thought process behind tyler's writing. art is subjective and we're all allowed our own opinions and all that jazz. i mean no hate or disrespect when i voice my opinions and only ask for mature responses that contribute to a healthy discussion.]

anyway we got deep at the end there but please don't jump on me bc my opinion is different from yours i beg T^T i left twitter to avoid that, please don't disappoint me tumblr clique :') but i was being serious innit, feel free to add your own opinions onto this :) i'd love to know what everyone else thought!

[oldiesstationlover11607]

🎶You had me at hello🎶 (if I used this one before, no I didn’t).

Hello! It’s 💛! And before I go any further I would like to apologize for breaking the TØP streak that you were on (even though you absolutely KILLLED the Party Poison story! It was exactly what I imagined it would be!). I had the idea in my mind and I just wanted to see it come to life in someway so I appreciate you doing it. Also, that Josh Dun story you did the same day, so cute! ☺️

To nobody’s big surprise, or maybe to your chagrin, I am falling back into the TØP cycle of fanfics with yet another request. You said you were getting a lot of Tyler, but have no fear! This one is Josh (it’s Torchbearer!Josh but…hopefully that’s close enough).

This may be too close to the Keons daughter story idea that you had in mind so if that’s the case just disregard this, but I was wondering if you could do an angsty story about the reader being Nico’s daughter (*gasp*), but she escaped Dema and joined the Banditos. Her and Torchbearer hit it off and become close (I’m imagining romantically but platonic could also work), but she never tells him who her father is. During trip into Dema when he goes to try to help break out some people trapped inside (NATN sorta thing), he finds out the truth. He comes back to the camp and angst ensues (whether or not it ends happily is up to you).

Like I said, I know this may be too close to your other plot idea, but I wanted to request it (also sorry for my yapping).

Daughter Series - Torchbearer + Clancy + Nico!Daughter

Warnings: Swearing and angst

Word Count: 3090

A/N: WELCOME! I do believe I killed this ngl...

PART 2 + PART 3 + Part 4

Contrary to popular belief, I wasn’t born in Dema. My mother had me outside of the walls before I was taken inside by my father, and my mom was never seen again. Growing up, that was a story I was forbidden to tell. My father rarely talked about my mom and if I ever asked, he would only say, “She didn’t understand the greater purpose, but I do. You will too, one day.” 

For a while, I believed him. How could I not? When you grow up with someone like Nico, your whole world revolves around what they tell you. He was my father, but he was also Dema’s leader, head bishop, the one who enforced the silence, control, and order we citizens were all too familiar with. No one defied Nico, not even his own daughter.

Life in Dema was strict but comfortable. I wasn’t treated like everyone else. My father made sure of that. I lived in one of the best apartments, with guards who kept a constant watch over me. In the evenings, I would look out from the balcony and watch the city below—lifeless, colorless, and silent. The people moved like shadows. It felt wrong but I couldn’t put my feelings into words. It was like a quiet voice that echoed in the back of my mind, begging me to see beyond the walls. That voice grew louder as I got older, especially when I overheard whispers of resistance. Stories about people who escaped. The transcripts of the Banditos were forbidden, but I found ways to read them. They described a world outside Dema, a world full of music, color, and freedom. I imagined it often—what it would feel like to run without fear, to laugh without looking over your shoulder.

For years, I buried that desire, letting my father’s teachings drown out the voice of rebellion inside me. He would tell me, “You are my legacy. Dema’s future. You don’t need anything else.” And I believed him—until the day I didn’t. I don’t exactly remember when I decided to leave. Maybe it was a slow realization, a growing awareness that I couldn’t stay in Dema–I couldn’t live like this. Or maybe it was the night I saw him–a Bandito. He had this bright yellow bandana tied around his head that covered his face and was sprinting across the city. His eyes were filled with fire, determination, and a passion I’d never felt before. Several citizens left that night and the next morning there were almost double the amount of glorious gone lined up. 

After that I couldn’t sleep. I stared at the ceiling, the walls of my apartment feeling tighter and tighter, as if they were closing in on me. I thought about the stories I had heard, the people who had escaped. For the first time, I wanted to know what it felt like. The voice in my head—the one I had tried so hard to suppress—was louder than ever.

I don’t know how I did it. Nico’s daughter wasn’t supposed to slip away unnoticed, but somehow I did. Maybe my father had gotten too comfortable. Maybe I wasn’t as much of a priority as he liked to pretend. It didn’t matter.

I ran.

The night I left Dema was the most terrifying night of my life. Every shadow felt like it could be a bishop or vulture watching, every step against the cobblestone ground echoed in my mind as if the entire city could hear me. But I didn’t stop until I got out of the catacombs. I couldn’t.

The Banditos found me the next morning, huddled in an abandoned building outside Dema’s reach. They took me in, gave me water, food, and shelter. They didn’t ask who I was right away, which was a relief. I didn’t want to tell them. Not yet. Not while Nico’s name was a curse on their lips.

I never expected to feel so at home among them, especially with him.

Torchbearer was everything Dema taught me to fear—brave, reckless, defiant. He radiated life in a way that was foreign to me, and yet, I couldn’t stay away from him. We met the night I arrived at camp. He approached me cautiously at first, well aware that most escapees were either violent or runners in their first few days. 

But I wasn’t like most escapees.

He asked me my name, and I hesitated, not wanting to give my real name. 

“Just call me…” I hesitated, not wanting to give him my real name. “Call me Ash.”

“That’s not your real name is it?” his head tilted and eyebrows raised slightly as he took a bite of the bread roll someone had brought through camp. 

“Nope,” I chuckled below my breath, “But something tells me your name isn’t Torchbearer.” He laughed and shook his head. The Torchbearer was the kind of person who knew when not to ask questions, something I was thankful for. 

As the months passed, we became close. Closer than I expected, closer than I thought I would let anyone get. At first, it was a hesitant friendship, both of us hearing each other out. We talked about the rebellion, we talked about vialism, and he talked about Dema. Over time, we became inseparable. I loved him. He showed me what it meant to live—truly live—outside the grasp of Dema’s cold, suffocating control. He showed me what it meant to have fun, to laugh, to joke, and to fight back.

And through it all, I kept my secret. I managed to keep him at arm’s length, no matter how much I wanted to let him in. Because how could I? How could I tell him that I was Nico’s daughter—the daughter of the man who had destroyed lives, stolen freedom, and enforced misery?

So I didn’t.

The guilt gnawed at me. Every time Torchbearer looked at me with those fiery eyes, filled with admiration and trust, I felt the weight of my life settle deeper into my chest. The longer I stayed with the Banditos, the more I realized I wasn’t just lying to Torchbearer. I was lying to everyone.

That was until my first raid. Each month Torchbearer and a few select Banditos would sneak into Dema to pick up escapees and add to the rebellion and after 10 months of being in Trench, Torchbearer had asked me to come. We all knew it was a risk, but as Dema reminded us–we had no choice. The mission was simple: get in and get out. We were the best at what we did. The Banditos had been in and out of Dema before, but this time felt different. This time, the stakes were higher. I was there. Torchbearer grabbed one of his yellow bandanas to tie around my arm so he could find me.

“Are you sure you’re okay to go back?” he asked, his fingers flowing perfectly to secure the knot. The hesitancy in his voice was mirrored by the look on his face. 

“It’s going to be okay Torch,” I smiled shyly, cupping his jaw and pressing my lips against him. He returned the kiss by his lips were shy, mind clearly elsewhere. 

“It’s difficult to go back, Ash. I just–I don’t want to lose you and I’m worried that you’re not ready for a mission this high stakes,” he pressed his forehead against mine, his fingers tangling through my hair. 

“I am ready. I want to go,” I insisted, the fear of the truth bubbling over. 

“Okay,” he raised his arms in defeat, “if you say you’re ready then I believe you.” Torchbearer pulled me in close, his chin resting on the top of my head while my face pressed against his chest. I was ready. I really was ready. 

Torchbearer led the charge, his eyes gleaming with determination. The night we infiltrated Dema, the city was as lifeless as I remembered. The silence was deafening. I hadn’t been back since I left, and the familiar streets, the cold concrete walls, sent a shiver down my spine. Memories flooded back—of my father, of the life I had left behind.

Torchbearer stayed close to me. He didn’t know the real reason for my tension, and I wasn’t about to explain it now. I needed to focus.

We split up to cover more ground. My heart pounded as I ran through the darkened alleys, sticking to the shadows. I found the building where they were keeping the prisoners and signaled to the others. Everything was going smoothly until I heard footsteps behind me.

I spun around, heart leaping into my throat. My hand hovered over my weapon, ready to fight, but when I saw who was standing there, the air was knocked out of me.

It was him.

Dad.

He stood there, calm, composed, his pale eyes locking onto mine like a hunter sizing up his prey. His presence made the air around us feel heavy, suffocating, like the very essence of Dema was crushing me.

“I knew you’d come back,” he said softly, his voice as smooth and cold as I remembered. “You couldn’t stay away forever.”

My heart hammered in my chest as I struggled to breathe. My mind raced, trying to come up with some kind of explanation, some excuse for why I was here. But what could I possibly say?

“Dad,” I whispered, my voice betraying me with a tremble.

He tilted his head, regarding me with the same detached curiosity he always had. Clothes in his traditional blood red robes there was no anger in his eyes, no surprise—just cold, calculating control. He stepped closer, and instinctively, I backed away.

“You left,” he continued, as if we were having a casual conversation over tea. “I wondered how long it would take for you to see reason. To realize your place was always here, by my side. With us.”

I felt like I was drowning. My pulse raced, my thoughts tangling together in panic. How had he found me so quickly? I wasn’t supposed to run into anyone—especially not him.

“I didn’t…” My voice faltered as I glanced around, searching for an escape. But there was none. “I didn’t come back for you. I’m here for them.”

Nico’s gaze sharpened. His cold smile never wavered. “Is that what they told you? That you’re here to ‘rescue’ our people? To ‘save’ them from our sacred religion?”

He took another step toward me, his eyes boring into mine. “You are my daughter. Our city’s future. There is no ‘saving’. There is only the Order. You belong with us.”

“No,” I said, my voice firmer this time. I took a deep breath, standing my ground. “I don’t belong here. Not anymore.”

For a moment, Nico was silent, his eyes narrowing as if he were studying me, calculating his next move. Then, his smile faded, replaced by something far more dangerous—disappointment.

“You are mistaken,” he said softly, his voice a low rumble that made my skin crawl. “You think you’ve escaped Dema, but you never left. You are still tied to this place. You always will be.”

I clenched my fists, trying to keep my composure. “I chose to leave. I chose a different life. I’m not your puppet anymore.”

Nico’s expression darkened. “Is that what you think? That you can just walk away from your legacy? You are my blood. You will come back to me.”

“No,” I said, the word feeling like a dagger in my throat. “I won’t.”

His eyes flashed with something I couldn’t place—anger, maybe, or something deeper, something darker. He took another step toward me, and for a second, I thought he might reach out and drag me back to our tower by force.

But instead, he stopped, his voice growing quieter, more insidious. “If you leave now, if you continue this path, you are lost to me. And when Dema rises—when the time comes—no one will be able to save you from what’s coming.”

I swallowed hard, my chest tightening. His words were like poison, seeping into my mind, but I pushed them away.

“I’m not afraid of you,” I lied, my voice barely a whisper.

Nico laughed, but this time, it was colder, emptier. “Yes, you are. You always have been.”

Before I could say anything else, I heard footsteps. Nico’s eyes flickered toward the sound, and for a brief moment, something like recognition crossed his face. He knew. He knew we weren’t alone.

“We’ll meet again, daughter,” he said quietly, pulling me in for a forceful hug. His arms wrapped around me like a vice, sending a chill down my spine. I could feel the weight of his authority, his control, pressing down on me as he whispered in my ear, his breath cold and steady. “You may try to escape your fate, but it will find you,” he murmured, his voice low and insidious. Then, with deliberate slowness, he pressed his cracked lips to my cheek—a twisted mockery of affection.

I wanted to push him away, to shove him back and break free, but I was frozen in fear, trapped in that moment. It was only when he finally released me, vanishing into the shadows, that I could breathe again. My heart was pounding, my hands shaking, and the air around me felt thick, suffocating.

But before I could even collect myself, I heard something—a gasp. My eyes shot up, and there, standing just a few feet away, was Torchbearer.

His face was pale, his eyes wide with shock and disbelief. He had seen everything.

“Torch—” I started, stepping toward him, but he took a step back, his expression hardening. The raw hurt in his eyes cut me deeper than any weapon could.

“Is that—” His voice faltered, then came out sharper, more accusatory. “That was him, wasn’t it? Blurryface.”

I opened my mouth, but the words wouldn’t come. My mind was racing, trying to find a way to explain, but what could I possibly say? Torchbearer had seen me in my father’s arms—Nico, the head of Dema, the enemy of everything we fought for. The truth was out.

“I-I can explain,” I stammered, my voice weak and trembling.

Torchbearer’s eyes were cold, his expression unreadable. “You lied to me.” His words were barely above a whisper, but they carried the weight of a thousand unspoken accusations.

“I didn’t—” I tried, but he cut me off.

“All this time… you knew. You knew, and you said nothing.” His voice rose, trembling with anger and betrayal. “We trusted you, Ash. I trusted you. And you… you’re his fucking daughter?”

The words stung, each one like a slap to the face. I took a step closer, desperate to make him understand, but he only backed away further, shaking his head.

“I’m not him,” I said, my voice breaking. “I’m not my dad. I left Dema. I chose to leave. I chose to be in Trench with you.”

Torchbearer’s face twisted with anger. “But you never told us! You lied about who you are—about everything. You let us believe… You let me believe…”

“I didn’t know how to tell you,” I whispered, tears stinging at the corners of my eyes. “I was scared. I thought if you knew—if you knew the truth—you’d look at me like this. Like I was him.”

“And how exactly am I supposed to look at you, Ash?” Torchbearer snapped, his voice cutting like a knife. “You’re his daughter! You’re part of this. You’re not you anymore.”

“I was part of it, yeah,” I said quickly, pleading. “But I’m not anymore. I left. I left him, I left this city, I left my home.”

“But you didn’t leave it behind, did you?” Torchbearer’s voice was cold, filled with bitterness. “You didn’t tell us the truth, and now… I don’t even know who you are anymore.”

I felt the ground slipping out from beneath me. “Torch, please. I’m still me. I’m still the same person.”

“No, you’re not.” His voice broke, and for a moment, the anger in his eyes softened into something else—something like pain. “I thought I knew you. I thought I could trust you. But you’ve been hiding this the whole time. How am I supposed to believe anything you say now?”

I couldn’t stop the tears from spilling over. “I didn’t want to hurt you. I didn’t want to hurt anyone. I thought… I thought I could just be part of this life, without bringing my past into it.”

Torchbearer let out a bitter laugh. “That’s not how it works. You can’t just pretend like your past doesn’t exist, Ash. You can’t just hide who you are and expect it to never come out.”

“I’m sorry,” I whispered, my voice breaking. “I never wanted this. I never wanted you to find out like this.”

Torchbearer shook his head, his expression filled with disappointment. “It doesn’t matter. The damage is done.”

He turned to leave, but I lunged forward, grabbing his arm. “Please. Don’t walk away. Don’t—I love you.”

He hesitated, but he didn’t pull his arm away. For a moment, hope flickered in my chest, but when he finally spoke, his voice was cold and final.

“I don’t know if I can forgive you, Ash.”

The words hit me like a punch to the gut, and I let go of his arm, the weight of everything crashing down on me.

Torchbearer took one last look at me, his eyes filled with a mixture of anger, hurt, and something else—something that made my heart ache even more.

And then he was gone, disappearing into the night, leaving me standing alone in the empty street, tears streaming down my face, my heart shattered.

“Y/N,” my father’s friend’s voice echoed through the street. Keons. The bishop I’d often found myself speaking to when I still lived here. He was one of the only leaders in this city who cared–or at least created the illusion that he cared–about citizens, especially those from his district. “You should come with me.”

“Why would I go with you?” I asked, my arms folded across my chest. 

“You left the city, right?” 

I nodded. 

“There’s someone I’d like you to meet. A boy from my district, he reminds me of you and I believe together you could do some good for our city,” he explained. 

“That doesn’t answer my question,” I said. 

“I assure you, you are not in any danger Y/N. This boy, he’s different from the other citizens,” he continued. 

“What’s his name?”

“Clancy.”

//

REQUESTS OPEN

[useyourglutes]

GUYS. GUYS GUYS GUYS.

LOOK AT THESE LYRICS FROM LEVITATE

THE OBVIOUS CONNECTION TO OVERCOMPENSATE IS RIGHT THERE. BUT WE COULD LOOK AT THIS IN TWO WAYS!!

1 - When they released Next Semester, it was a single with overcompensate and the edited version of it. In that, Overcompensate is TRACK 2!!!! hmmmmmmmmm. now in my insane theory-ridden mind, this has something to do with dema. i think clancy is going to try and destroy it from the inside - that's been my main theory for a long time, but this kinda solidifies that.

2 - On the actual album tracklist, Next Semester is track 2. Overcompensate felt very much like it was leading up to something big - perhaps next semester is either clancy reminiscing on old memories before going into dema just in case he doesnt make it back. OR!!!! clancy goes through with the plan of infiltrating dema and taking it down from the inside, but ends up brainwashed - similar to SAI in a way. the bishops kind of take away those memories, hence the lyrics of 'i remember certain things, what i was wearing, the yellow dashes in the street' - and we all know yellow is the banditos color, while red is the bishops. circling back to the overcompensate vid, red is very clearly the theme this album, with clancy and the torchbearer both wearing it, further solidifying my theory of clancy trying to take down the bishops from inside dema.

i have so much more to say about this specific theory (plus all my others) but thats just a brief overview :))